China — To Pee or not to Pee

A news report states that “The city of Shenzen plans to crack down on urinators who miss their mark provoking online derision over how the rule will be enforced. The pee fine will apply to those who urinate outside the bowl of facilities in Shenzhen, the souther boom town neighbouring Hong Kong, although draft regulations seen by AFP did not specify a minimum quantity of spillage required to be classed as a violation. “Such uncouth use of a public toilet will be fined 100 yuan ($16) by authorities” from next month, a city government official told AFP on Tuesday”. Besides what’s been stated as part of the report this raises many other questions on the lighter side of life as follows.

This step would necessitate the presence of hordes of toilet inspectors being deployed to inspect performance. A number of new civil servant positions will be created. There will be a supervisor behind every urinating person to see whether the pee is straight or not. If nothing else this has the potential of creating 20 jobs on an average for every public toilet. Talking about performance the micros of Key Performance Indicators would have to be specified in all fairness to impose a fine on a deviant person. As already mentioned the quantum of spillage needs to be specified and once that has been specified a method would need to be instituted to implement this measure and record deviations. The inspectors would have to be equipped with calibrated spillage collection devices which could turn red once the spillage exceeds the stipulated limits. In addition the Inspectors would need to be provided special training to enhance the level of agility so as to step in at the right time with the calibrated devices.

Over and above this one would need to make provisions for regular defaulters by creating history logs. This would obviously be possible by capturing data on “real time” basis. A corpus of funds could be created from the penalties imposed towards the Toilet Automation and computerization process, which could be named ‘TACT Force’ which in expanded form would mean Toilet Automation and Computerization Task Force. This is also the most befitting acronym for the activity as a lot of ‘Tact’ would be called for to make the Toilet and Automation hardware coexist in harmony.

While a lot of attention has been devoted to the fines, penalties and compliance matters, one would also need to pay attention to good performance characteristics to suitably institute rewards for good performance and motivate positive reinforcement. The criteria to be covered towards good performance may include items like persistence accuracy in being on the mark: disposing off the urine with limited or no trajectory causing spillage: consistent flow without interruptions or the negative of drops around the bowl, completing the task without any last second shakes and most important of all completing the entire cycle without breaking the Toilet cum Urine decorum with impulse pressured farts. While working out the criteria exemptions would need to be made for the specially enabled civilians like elderly people, people with prostrate problems, people with Urinary tract infections and most important of all people who are shorter than average to be able to reach the bowl without forming a trajectory which is punishable. In this category ladders should be provided for extremely short people.

A system would need to interface for the specially enabled as the medical condition of these people would need to be certified by authorized medical personnel. These people would be required to carry their certificates to be granted exemptions. There is also a move to follow the proven success model of sports, “Catch them young” with mandatory training and coaching sessions at school level. Adults who miss the window at the school level would be provided simulator interface in all public gyms.

With so many diverse initiatives China is geared to make a success of the pee program. See you in the next edition of the program. Till then ‘go with the flow’!

Brand Strategist with the belief that views, opinions, perspectives are brand extensions with objectivity & paradigms both. Some Tweets are like strong brands.

Brand Strategist with the belief that views, opinions, perspectives are brand extensions with objectivity & paradigms both. Some Tweets are like strong brands.